Psychology

There are a number of theorists who came up with theories to do with human development. Basically, the very first years of human development have been noted to have a great impact on the future life of that individual person. Because of that, a number of theorists proposed these theories of human development in order to relate some of the human behaviours and social conditions, and relating them together to see the influence they have in child development. This paper discusses how the birth order theory by Alder can be applied to give this explanation, and Erik Erikssons psychological theory of human development. These theories are discussed to see how the very first five years of human life are so vital in the development of a human being.

The Past is Still Happening
Being the eldest among the four children in our family, it seems that I always have an unconventional life, and have some different developments. Having been the first child in the family, I thought I would get the greatest attention, care and respect but that would not happen in our culture. Being a girl, I had no much knowledge that there was a preference of male offspring over females, something deeply embedded within the Indian culture. This is because I would grow up and inherit everything, while the ladies would be married by the man who had been chosen by the parents. My mother was also pregnant during those years, she did all house chores and no one bothered to help her since it was her duty and responsibility. She did not feel that anyone was there to perhaps look after me while she did the rest of the house work, and hence I ended up being abandoned and not cared much for. Later, my mom took me to live with grandmother and later all attention was turned to my younger sister. I saw myself being disowned, and this would be the beginning for hating my small sister. At the age of five I pushed her from the stairs for having been dressed in my old dresses. This can be explained by Eriks theory of psychological development.

The very initial stage of Eriks theory of psychosocial development will occur from birth to one year age, and this is known to be a fundamental stage of human life. Due to having the infant utterly self-dependent, there occurs a development of sheer mistrust which may be aggravated by the caretakers.

This mistrust makes the child feel insecure and lacking true emotions, fear and belief that everything in the universe is unpredictable, malicious and inconsistent. Having not been cared for, and with constant changes in guardianship, I developed this mistrust which otherwise could not have developed within me (Engler, 2008). This explains why the competitive aspect seemed to make me not love my sister. The other parts of my life would as well be in accordance with Eriks theory. Another important theory is Erikssons psychosocial stages of development theory. With this theory, the psychological impacts on a child will influence the growth patterns of the child hence becoming depressed, hating those around him or her and so on. This is one of the major theories that may have greatly impacted on me.

At the age of eight years, I had to live again with my mom because my grandmother who took care of me was moving to Canada. All I knew and all I believed was that my grandmother abandoned me. I became terrified for having been left and that became a very big turning point for my life as I had to start all over again with my mom and sister. My father was already working in the United States and thus he had no much time for us. In 1994, my father moved us to the USA at the same time when our family got bigger. That did not bring me closer to the family since I was always jealous of all my siblings. I was feeling alone in my life and feared everyone as well, and I had the great feeling that all people who got to know would as well leave me alone. Although I was having a hard time dealing with my family, living in the US was quite different than I had imagined. Yet, I felt at ease because I thought that I was already free from culture I was brought up in. This had brought some liberty in me, but this freedom I thought to have never lasted for long. Later, I started going to SCC and I had no idea what I wanted to take up. I just took general classes to keep my parents from forcing me to get married. But things did not work out for me there. I continued my schooling at Wesleyan University, where I took up a major in political science. Later I dropped out of school without informing my parents and I had to lie to them about everything until I could figure out a way on how I could redeem myself. Later I would find myself looking for a job in a beach. This would be the turning point of my life since I was recruited in the US Navy. This made me to have the courage to face my parents and tell them about this decision I had already made. Needless to say, my parents were upset with my choice but none of that mattered anymore. I was ready to leave my old life behind even if I was not sure about what was waiting for me there. This goes with the Alders birth order theory. Looking at the Alders birth order theory, the fact that I was the first born would come to change my following years of life. But in my case, the birth order did not play the greatest influence on my personality development, but because of influences like parental attitudes and care, living standards, gender roles and abrupt change in guardianship (Engler, 2008). Just as the Adlerian theory proposes, the birth order influences would finally begin to die when our family would become re-united, and willing to understand each other. I will therefore argue that, it can be very possible that these occurrences in future life can be easily resolved if taken care of in the very first five years of an individuals life.

Here I met rude people for the first time ever, but I certainly did not give up nor cried about my decision to join the Navy despite the hardships I faced because it was something I wanted to do. It was the first decision that I have made for myself I had no other choice but to get through it. When I came to the camp, I did not get in touch with my family for a while. Later, I ended up calling my parents while at the regiment, and I could sense that they had forgiven me, and this seemed to encourage me to finish what I had started. The boot camp was not the end of Navy life for me, but just the beginning.

After the trainings, I was stationed at Whidbey Island, WA. A few days later, I got my orders to travel. Someone picked me up and dropped me off at the Seattle airport where I met two guys who were going to the same location as I was. After two days of nonstop flying and getting lost in different airports, we arrived in Bahrain where we waited for 6 more hours before the COD took us to the aircraft carrier. I lived in the COD aircraft carrier for four months, and there I had the opportunity to visit different countries. I just could not believe my life. Hence, whenever the Navy needs someone to be deployed, I would always be the first one to volunteer. While everyone wanted to stay at home with their families, I wanted to get as far away as possible to leave all my worries behind. In the military I fell into a relationship, though I would never introduce the young man to my parents. My past experiences taught me how to be better than others and I was able to network aside my command.

Perhaps, these working perspectives and attitude proved my worth as an individual. The theory of Adlers Creative self has a greater significant in my development. With the theory, due to the differences between the parents and the people around you, one will try to develop some form of superiority and tend to do what he or she feels may be the source of salvation.

The next 7 months of my life were unreal. I got to travel all over Europe, Middle East, and Africa. Now, having achieved all that in my life, I feel it is the high time I went back and completed my fragmented education. Finally, I decided to leave military to pursue my educational goal. Later, my relationship with my parents and siblings grew better, and they respected me as a person. They also do not force me to get married their own way and I have been able to contain my anger in the right way. I am also waiting for the day when I can stand against some cultural practices, and spell them point blank to my parents. Looking back at the last 26 years of my life, I can fairly say I have come a long way. Of course, my life is not perfect and there are lots of things I wish I could change, but those imperfections made my life meaningful. I am quite content with what I have, and I am always ready for what life might bring.

Looking at my life, there are a number of occurrences that have been brought about by the kind of life that was imposed on me during my first five years of my life. The future life will be shaped by the kind of life and attitude of life that was led in those first five years. Different theories have been proposed which have great implications in human development, and especially during the growth of a child. If these issues are never in any way addressed during these first years, then the future life will tend to be influenced in certain ways (Engler, 2008). If these issues are addressed during those years, then a number of positive attitudes towards life would be exhibited later in life. A good example is the Alderian birth order theory which must have greatly impacted in my early growth. According to this theory a number of things happened which are true to it and which could have been prevented should I have been given the necessary support by my parents. For instance, my psychological situation must have been different as a child. My opinions would lead me in determining the attitudes I would have in life. Having been separated from my parents and grandmother at such a tender age, the Alderian proposed sub-groups in the birth order formed. There was the competition between me and my sister in search for attention and the reason I assaulted her so much. Because of this nature of life during the early stages of life, I was unable to develop to a better person in the following years of my life (Engler, 2008). Sullivan personality Development theory must also have a greater impact on my life. During these developmental stages, I tried to get what I thought would be right for me after having lost good relations with the people behind my family.

The other theory which supports this fact is Erik Erikssons theory of psychological development. He believed that human beings will have the first few years of their lives making a turning point depending on how a child is brought up, and this is something that can be exhibited for the next many years in life (Engler, 2008). The second stage of this theory is the Doubt and Doubt vs. Autonomy. This sees the child developing some sharper sense of self control. Just like Sigmund Freud, Erik believed enough training would be a major part in the process. Other events and developments here would include the gaining of greater control over toys, food choices, and clothing. Having not been able to get these, I would not be able to prevent most of the occurrences. I can also agree that there are very many theories like Freuds Developmental theories which may have similar explanations in human development. Therefore, if we could easily change and address these issues using these theories of development in the first five years of child growth, we would have control of the other parts of life. Because of these occurrences, the past is still happening with me, although I am getting my conscience back slowly by slowly this is because the way a child develops in the first few years of life determines the future life of that individual (Engler, 2008).