Psychology

The effect of divorce on children is determined by the age and gender of the child and also by other factors like the ability of the child to cope with stressful events. Some of these effects emerge immediately, others appear over the first years and decrease later while some emerge later in life. Some children may recover quickly from the effects of divorce but negative effects may emerge later in life due to denied feelings at a subconscious level, a factor referred to as repressed memory. Children have to cope with the changes that have occurred in their families. Since it is the mothers who are often awarded custody of the children, the contact with their dad is reduced. It has been shown that boys are more at risk than girls (Wayne, 1994). The absence of the father, the role model for males, makes it hard for the boys to adjust to divorce. Other changes in the childrens life include change of schools and moving away from their homes or living in two homes. Their standards of living may decrease. This may mean that some of the childrens needs may not be catered for.  The children may be forced to take up more responsibilities at that young age which may burden them and make them feel less cared for. This happens when a marriage ends in an angry conflict and the deep feelings that the parents had initially decline. This may make the parent to no longer undertake the responsibilities which heshe did voluntarily for the children and hence leave the children to undertake these responsibilities all by themselves. Also, the custodial parent may be less available due to many responsibilities and duties that heshe may be forced to take in order to meet the childrens needs and demands. The degree of the effects depends on whether the child was part of the conflict that resulted in divorce. If the child was part of the conflict, heshe will experience more frustration, anger and confusion.

Children experience emotional frustration due to lack of father-child relationship which is important for the long term development of the child. This is because the father tends to disengage both geographically an emotionally over the years. Research has shown that the problems associated with divorce progress throughout the life of the child. (Amato and Booth, 1996). The specific shorterm effects therefore include anger, sadness, depression, opposition, aggression, economic hardship, interpersonal conflict, noncompliance, lower academic achievement, low self esteem and increased dependency. These shorterm effects may lead to long term effects. But the long term effects cannot be predicted from how the children react immediately after divorce (Wallerstein, 1989). Studies have also shown that these children after growing up still have a dominant feeling of sorrow about the divorce. Children also have a poorer physical health, persistent emotional problems, poor relationships with members of the opposite sex and earlier sexual intercourse among others. Also, children from a divorced family are more likely to divorce when they get families (Wallerstein, 1989).

The main effect of remarriage on the children is the feeling that they are betraying their natural parent. It has been shown that the younger the child the easier for himher to adopt the new parent. But this is not always true. The child will always have a natural instinct to protect the parent that is no longer at home or the one who is suffering from the new relationship.

Conclusion
The effects of divorce on the children are many and diverse. Most of these effects are permanent on the child and the divorce may haunt the children for the rest of their lives. It is therefore important for the parents to know the effects of divorce on the children. Also when the custodial parent decides to remarry, it is important to know that the re marriage is not all about them and the spouse but also between the children. There should be a smooth transition to ensure that the remarriage is a benefit to all.